Archive for the ‘Not Self Help’ Category

2009 in Review. 2010 in Preview

The past 12 months have been a whirlwind of experiences. I have conquered fears, achieved goals, and found out things about myself I never knew. But just like anyone else, everything was not all roses, sparkles and fairy dust. There are many things I still haven’t changed. There have been missed opportunities, and unsatisfactory situations. Pitfalls. Road blocks. Rabid monkeys. But most importantly I have grown as a person, and although life is not perfect (but really, when is it?), it has been an exciting almost magical adventure. And every day I learn to live it more fully.

Here are some notable 2009 events.

The greatest of ease
In May, I performed for the first time ever as a (fledgling) circus performer. In retrospect, it was not a big deal. It was a showcase at PSCA. Pretty much a recital for adults. My friends and family came to see me. I didn’t fall. All in all, a great success. However, at the time it was a big deal to me. I had serious stage fright and the thought of anybody watching me do anything would give me sweaty palms and make me shake. I would get nervous practicing in front of my class, which consisted of 5 people. At the showcase I performed in front of about 80 people, twice.  Ever since that night my performance anxiety has significantly decreased.  I feel more confident in class. I haven’t performed since then, but I have a feeling it will be MUCH better the next time around.
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To Be A Kid Again: An Attempt at Regression

kid
It seems like we are all born with an innate instinct to know exactly what it is we need in life.  We learn how to walk and talk on our own. As small children, We eat when we are hungry, sleep whenever we are tired and poop whenever we feel like poopin’ (literally). Have you ever seen a child screech like a banshee while rolling around on the ground? Odds are that was just something that seemed like fun at the time.

The idea is that, before they are conditioned not to, kids live in the moment. They don’t watch the clock or set a schedule of what toys they can play with at certain times. They go with their feelings and enjoy every moment. And for that, children are happy, unique little souls. As they grow older, they get more rules applied to their lives and are constantly being told what is “normal” and right. They hide the original part of themselves deep down inside and cover it up with ideas and actions that belong to others. Then these children go to school, then college and then get jobs. Then those children become me and you.

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Castles In The Air

castle

“If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put the foundations under them.” -Walden, Henry David Thoreau

*Photo by Gustavo Rodrìguez

For the Love of Flow

I just finished reading Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi’s “Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience”.  Csikszentmihalyi (who I lovingly refer to as sisszenmantilyhakiirarghyigjo) writes so eloquently about this state of mind that you almost forget you are reading a psychology book. It doesn’t come off as a self help book either.  Just a fountain of useful information about how creativity and concentration can make you happier. – A lazy brain is a sad brain.

My absolute favorite part of this book is when he points out the problem with our culture of worshiping entertainment. Keep in mind this book was written in the 80′s, but it is oh so relevant today. It seems like today everyone is completely lost without their cell phones, the Internet, television, or games. Most people are so consumed with what everyone else is doing, that they forget about themselves.

“The tremendous leisure industry that has arisen in the last few generations has been designed to help fill free time with enjoyable experiences. Nevertheless, instead of using our physical and mental resources to experience flow, most of us spend many hours each week watching celebrated athletes playing in enormous stadiums. Instead of making music, we listen to platinum records cut by millionaire musicians. Instead
of making art, we go admire paintings that brought in the highest bids at the latest auctions. We do not run risks acting on our own beliefs, but occupy hours each day watching actors who pretend to have adventures, engaged in mock-meaningful action.
This vicarious participation is able to mask, at least temporarily, the underlying emptiness of wasted time. But it is a very pale substitute for attention invested in real challenges. The flow experience that results from the use of skills leads to growth; passive entertainment leads nowhere. Collectively we are wasting each year the equivalent of millions of years of human consciousness. The energy that could be used to focus on complex goals, to provide for enjoyable growth, is squandered on patterns of simulation that only mimic reality. Mass leisure, mass culture, and even high culture when attended to passively and for extrinsic reasons — such as the wish to flaunt one’s status — are parasites of the mind. They absorb psychic energy without providing substantive strength in return. They leave us more exhausted, more disheartened than we were before.”

What are you doing with your life? Are you wasting time passively consuming culture? Are you living a life you don’t really want because cause it is “just what you do”? Or are you a creating a life that is all your own?

Go my child…live and love -that’s all you need to do.